Now I am absolutely SURE this is a coincidence... I mean, to suggest otherwise would be INCREDIBLY cynical, right? But... now keep in mind, this is JUST A COINCIDENCE...but...
They finally responded to me THE DAY AFTER MY FLIGHT.
Coincidence, right?
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
In this timely email, coming from the same address ([email protected]) to which I had sent my emails requesting a timely response, Don C. Grant, who would become my new pen pal stated that he couldn't find my information, so I wouldn't be getting any refund.
I was unable to locate a ticket or reservation using the information that you provided. The refund conditions of tickets are governed by the fare rules of the ticket as agreed upon at the time of purchase. Tickets are eligible for a refund if the airline cancels a flight, within 24 hours of departure, or causes a flight time arrival delay of more than 120 minutes in an active itinerary. Per our Contract of Carriage, this is considered an involuntary action and disruption to a passenger's flights. However, when a customer cancels prior to any airline action (i.e. a flight cancellation or significant schedule change), this is considered a voluntary action, and ecredits for future travel apply. Based on the information provided in your message it does not appear that you tickets are eligible for refund. |
Artist's Rendition of Delta Airlines's Don C. Grant |
Golly, Donny. You were "unable to locate a ticket or reservation" for me? What a shame. And what a shame that you waited until the day AFTER my flight to let me know that you "couldn't find" that crucial piece of information. I do have one question, though: Did you even look? I bet you did look, and I bet you did find it, because you brought up the bit about how if someone cancels of their own accord, it's not eligible for a refund. You're trying to make it look like I never requested a refund until after I canceled. Just like I said you would. I also noticed that you didn't bother cc'ing the DoT. I wonder why.
Here's what I wrote to Donny at his [email protected] (while also cc'ing the DoT):
Mr. Grant: |
Artist's Rendition of Yours Truly |
Donny is a professional. He is not swayed by facts, or even decency. His only loyalty is to his corporate master. He very cleverly ignores what I have told him and sticks with his Sgt. Schultz line: "I know nothing!"
(Dear reader: I am sorry for invoking such an old popular culture reference. While it may betray what a cranky old geezer I must be to have seen Hogan's Heroes, let me offer two items in my defense:
1. You already knew I was a cranky old geezer because I'm not going to let the bastards win. That's right -- they can pay me my money back AND get off of my lawn. And...
2. I only saw the show in syndicated reruns. I swear! I never saw it air originally, and I don't even know when it originally aired.)
But I digress. Anyway, here's Sgt. Donny "Schultz" Grant's response to my email:
I'm sorry to read that you were dissatisfied with our response. For complaints submitted via the DOT we have up to 60 days to respond and we strive to do so much sooner. However, complaints are answered in the order in which they are received. That said, you still have not provided a ticket number or record locator for me to properly determine if a refund of your ticket is due. Please respond to this message with a ticket number (006-) or Delta record locator. |
Don "Sgt. Schultz" Grant |
You know, at this point, I finally wised up. You see how he said he was sorry to read that I was dissatisfied? I didn't even believe him -- not for a minute. Are you proud of my newfound loss of naiveté? Yeah. Me, too.
And so I gave him my record locator. And Donny continued to ignore what the DoT said and ONLY talk about Delta's rules:
Using the information provided I found unused tickets for [your family]. Our records indicate that on May 24th Delta flight 1202 from Minneapolis to San Francisco on August 22, scheduled departure of 330 PM was removed from the scheduled and replaced with flight 719, departing at 333 PM. A change of aircraft is not a qualifying event for a refund. Further, there is a distinct difference between an advanced "schedule change" and "cancellation", which usually occurs within 24 hours of departure. Our records also indicate that you were advised on July 27th that this type of change does not qualify for a refund as your arrival at destination was not delayed by more than 120 minutes. As such, I must reiterate that these tickets are not refundable and each passenger will retain the value of their tickets for use until December 31, 2022. |
Delta Airlines's Don C. Grant |
While it's nice that Donny can spout the company line, which makes its own definitions, it does not overrule the DoT's definition. And so I said unto my unhelpful pen-pal:
Mr. Grant: |
Dissatisfied Customer |
Now, dear Reader, I suppose that you can imagine the effect this had upon our obstinate friend...
If you said, "Absolutely none," you would be right! Quoth he:
As stated, per the fare rules of these tickets as agreed upon at the time of purchase, these tickets do not meet the criteria for a refund. We do appreciate your persistence but we will have to agree that we cannot find the right solution this time. Any further communication would not be productive and we will not respond again regarding this incident. |
Don C. Grant |
Did he just... ?!
With the...
Oh, no he di-n't!!
He just broke up with me!!!! Over email!!!
I'm ghosted!?
It's taken me months to get over the heartbreak of Donny breaking it off. To be honest, I haven't even tried to contact him since then. Also, I've been busy with work and kids and whatnot, so it's taken a while to put this site together. But mostly it's the heartbreak. So if I may speak to my dearest Donny Grant again... It's not over.
"Was it over when the Germans Bombed Pearl Harbor?" - John "Bluto" Blutarsky
Part SIX |